Hello, my dear blog friends. Do you know how much I love reading your comments? It is one of the things that gives me joy during my days.
Lately, I'm been thinking and hoping and dreaming and praying and planning...a lot. By this time next year, I want to be writing and creating much more than I am. I really want to take my life into a whole new direction.
But it's scary.
I read a lot of blogs of people who really do seem to have a charmed life or at least they've been able to get what they want in their lives. And it's not necessarily that they are well off in a monetary way, but they are doing what they love and they're not starving. That's what I want for my life. But latetly, I've been concerned that maybe there isn't enough charm, or whatever, left over for me. Maybe the Universe only has so much charm and it's running out. Or maybe it has a yearly quota or something and there's already a waiting list for next year. So, what do I do then?
And then there are the fears of what others might say about what I'm trying to do. Will everyone think I'm crazy? Will I disappoint some? Will I enrage others?
Am I thinking too much? Should I just go for it?
That's what I'm thinking; I should just go for it.
If you have any similar experiences with happy endings, would you mind sharing them with me?
2 comments:
I finally decided to just go for it! For me, that meant getting back into school (after 8 years away!)- taking a few grad courses to meet prereq requirements, taking the GRE, applying to grad school....all while my husband works full-time (w/ a low teacher's salary) and caring for my kids too. I wish I could tell you the happy ending to my story, but I'm still waiting to hear from grad schools- and then I have the whole program to actually go through. But I'm excited and hopeful and satisfied. It's HARD, for sure. And sometimes I feel that I neglect other important areas of my life, but isn't that true with a lot of things when you're so totally focused on achieving a particular goal? Anyway, good luck as you make your choices!
I'm on the edge of my own precipice. Except that I don't know exactly what it is that I want. I don't feel driven and inspired like I used to. I feel tired and used up and gray. Like all the color is gone from my world. And something has to change but I don't know what. Or how. And sometimes it feels selfish. Like I'm supposed to be blissfully happy changing diapers and folding laundry and force feeding picky eaters. Like if I do something for myself I'm less of a mom.
You should go for it-knowing that you may fail, but may also succeed beyond your wildest dreams. And knowing that the risk is worth it because no matter how things turn out the ones who love you most will always be there for you. And that failure isn't permanent. It's a bit cliche but if at first you don't succeed......well, you know the rest. And deep down inside I also think you already know what you are going to do.
Post a Comment