Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Fat Tuesday: 2 Reasons I Hate Photoshop

I hate Photoshop. Why?

Well, first, is that I have no idea how to use it. Seriously, Adobe, could you create some product that I can actually figure out and use? Because, right now, the best I can do is save my documents as a PDF. And that's just because it's an option for Pages (at home) and Word (at work).

I sort of think that Photoshop was created to make people who think they're intelligent, educated human beings and transform them into monkeys hitting the keyboard, hoping that SOMETHING will work!

And then, of course, there are things like this:



Did you SEE that? People who wield Photoshop are like magicians! They can totally change a human being (perfectly normal human beings who, if they walked down the street, you would think, hey, that person isn't ugly) and make this person into something that will never be seen in nature! (Or, again, walking down the street.)

Back "in the day", when magazines airbrushed the models on the front covers, there really was only so much that could be done, you know? But now, with Photoshop, they (I don't really know who "they" are; perhaps "they" are actually the robots who are plotting the demise of the human race; I know they've been working on getting rid of human teachers for years) make a person perfect.

Perfect.

There is no competing against perfect. Not for me. Not for the, as the video points out, the elementary school girls who read magazines and think that they're fat.

Photoshop, I hope you feel some shame for making the rest of us feel like hideous beings in comparison to your glittering images. Although, as you are computer software, I know you have no feelings. But you and your robot companions better be careful, because I'm watching you.

Always watching...



1 comment:

Emily McLean said...

The key is that it's not a competition, once you know that you have already won! ;)