I'm not going to make resolutions this year. Instead, I'm giving myself 3 wishes for the new year. I'm not a genie or a fairy or a talking fish, so I can't grant anyone else 3 wishes. Just myself. Here they are:
1. I wish for a year of following my bliss. A year that includes writing and creating art and being in my children's lives.
2. I wish for a year of happiness for my sweetheart. For him coming home safe in April, for him finding a job he can like and that can support our family, and for him to begin to live a life he loves.
3. I wish for a year of realized dreams for all those I love and care for. And, yes, that means your dreams as well.
As I said, I can't grant you three wishes, but you can grant them to yourself. What will you wish for in this new year?
*Andria*
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Is there enough for all of us?
Hello, my dear blog friends. Do you know how much I love reading your comments? It is one of the things that gives me joy during my days.
Lately, I'm been thinking and hoping and dreaming and praying and planning...a lot. By this time next year, I want to be writing and creating much more than I am. I really want to take my life into a whole new direction.
But it's scary.
I read a lot of blogs of people who really do seem to have a charmed life or at least they've been able to get what they want in their lives. And it's not necessarily that they are well off in a monetary way, but they are doing what they love and they're not starving. That's what I want for my life. But latetly, I've been concerned that maybe there isn't enough charm, or whatever, left over for me. Maybe the Universe only has so much charm and it's running out. Or maybe it has a yearly quota or something and there's already a waiting list for next year. So, what do I do then?
And then there are the fears of what others might say about what I'm trying to do. Will everyone think I'm crazy? Will I disappoint some? Will I enrage others?
Am I thinking too much? Should I just go for it?
That's what I'm thinking; I should just go for it.
If you have any similar experiences with happy endings, would you mind sharing them with me?
Thursday, December 10, 2009
30 Things I Believe
Today, I decided to have my students start writing This I Believe essays. As usual, there was moaning and groaning, but I told them that these essays are so different from the other essays they've written before. I showed them two examples: "Be Cool To The Pizza Delivery Dude" by an English teacher named Sarah Adams and "Thirty Things I Believe" by 7 year old Tarak McLain. This is the first year I've used the Thirty Things essay, because I just found it, and I'm really glad I did. After we read the essay, I asked the students to write 30 things they believe. I also wrote 30 things I believe. And here they are:
1. I believe everyone has the ability to be creative.
2. I believe we are stronger than we realize.
3. I believe every person I meet has something to teach me.
4. I believe if more people would read, they would suffer less.
5. I believe you have to support those you love in their dreams.
6. I believe you have to dream or you'll die.
7. I believe God has more blessings for us than we even dare to ask for.
8. I believe God wants to bless us with all of those things, but he's waiting for us to ask.
9. I believe in black pens.
10. I believe some obsessions are healthy.
11. I believe people should sing at the top of their lungs, even if they can't carry a tune.
12. I believe everyone has the right and privilege to be happy.
13. I believe writing frees the soul and the mind.
14. I believe chocolate can solve some problems.
15. I believe a heart can be broken and grow back stronger than before.
16. I believe that the closest place to a heaven in this world is on a sandy beach in Washington state.
17. I believe acrylic gel medium is my best friend.
18. I believe crying can sometimes lead to the clearest thinking.
19. I believe in love.
20. I believe that we appreciate what we have only after its absence.
21. I believe you should make friends wherever you go.
22. I believe wishes come true.
23. I believe miracles do happen.
24. I believe my children will be smarter than I am.
25. I believe you must go out, search, and find your bliss.
26. I believe all people are created equally.
27. I believe there won't be a time during my life where all people are treated equally.
28. I believe you don't have to be able to draw to create a work of art.
29. I believe in God.
30. I believe that we are all children of God and that he loves us all.
So, what do you believe?
1. I believe everyone has the ability to be creative.
2. I believe we are stronger than we realize.
3. I believe every person I meet has something to teach me.
4. I believe if more people would read, they would suffer less.
5. I believe you have to support those you love in their dreams.
6. I believe you have to dream or you'll die.
7. I believe God has more blessings for us than we even dare to ask for.
8. I believe God wants to bless us with all of those things, but he's waiting for us to ask.
9. I believe in black pens.
10. I believe some obsessions are healthy.
11. I believe people should sing at the top of their lungs, even if they can't carry a tune.
12. I believe everyone has the right and privilege to be happy.
13. I believe writing frees the soul and the mind.
14. I believe chocolate can solve some problems.
15. I believe a heart can be broken and grow back stronger than before.
16. I believe that the closest place to a heaven in this world is on a sandy beach in Washington state.
17. I believe acrylic gel medium is my best friend.
18. I believe crying can sometimes lead to the clearest thinking.
19. I believe in love.
20. I believe that we appreciate what we have only after its absence.
21. I believe you should make friends wherever you go.
22. I believe wishes come true.
23. I believe miracles do happen.
24. I believe my children will be smarter than I am.
25. I believe you must go out, search, and find your bliss.
26. I believe all people are created equally.
27. I believe there won't be a time during my life where all people are treated equally.
28. I believe you don't have to be able to draw to create a work of art.
29. I believe in God.
30. I believe that we are all children of God and that he loves us all.
So, what do you believe?
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
What I Learned About Life From NaNoWriMo
I'm back!
Yep, I've been gone for over a month. I'm sure you're all wondering why. Well, I was participating in National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) and I had to write a 50,000 word novel in 30 days. Although I did write the 50,000 words, I didn't actually finish the novel, so don't start asking when you'll find it in paperback at your local bookstore.
As I worked on my novel, I actually discovered a lot about myself and even a few things about life. And as this the place where I muse, here are my musings about life from NaNoWriMo.
1. When you start to get bored, throw in a love scene. One night I was struggling to get my 1667 words to keep me on track. I was bored. I wasn't enjoying what I was writing. I didn't feel like anything interesting was happening. I was about ready to tear it up (or backspace it all). Instead, however, I decided to throw in a kissing scene. Now, it was a very tasteful kissing scene, don't worry. But it boosted my word count and pushed me over my 1667 words for the evening.
What does this have to do with real life, you ask? You may not have a significant other in your life, or your significant other might be in a land far, far away, so a kissing scene may not be in store for you. But I'm sure you love to do something, right? That's the kind of love scene I'm talking about. Spend some time doing something you really love. If that's crafting, do that. If it's writing, do that. If it's cleaning, um, do that then. Just spend some quality time with that activity. I think it'll boost endorphins almost as much as kissing does.
2. The rule of 400, 900, 1667. I discovered this strange little rule early on in the writing of my 50,000 words. The first 400 words would be fairly easy to write. The next 500 were pure torture! I couldn't think of anything to write. Every time I'd check my word count, it would only be about 20 more than the time I checked it before. Then, somehow, after I'd hit about 900, the next 700+ words were easy sailing.
Here's how I believe this can be applied to real life: It'll get harder before it gets easier. Isn't that something that some aged wisewoman would say? Seriously, I can see it embroidered on a pillow. But it is so true. But maybe, more precisely, I should say, "It'll start out easy and then it'll get harder and then it'll get easier." Sometimes we set out to do something, and it isn't so bad. We think, "Hey, I can totally handle this!" And then we get trucking along, complacent in our ability to accomplish the task and, dagnabit!, it gets hard! We want to give up, because there is just no end in sight to our troubles. And then, miraculously, after a while, things get easier again. Perhaps that is the Circle of Life. Or, as I call it, the rule of 400, 900, 1667.
3. Sometimes you can find jewels in big, huge piles of garbage. Some nights I'd be writing just to get my 1667 words done. I knew what I was writing wasn't very good. I wasn't sure where my plot was going or what motiviated my characters to act. And I'd end up with too many words that were probably (almost certainly) going to be completely cut from my novel. It was word garbage. Big, huge piles of it. But, again, almost certainly, I would discover something new about my characters or I'd write a line of dialogue that I loved or the next part of my plot would suddenly pop into my head. They were teeny, tiny jewels, or sometimes not so teeny, tiny, but they were totally worth going through all of the garbage I had written before.
We all have big, huge piles of garbage in our lives. Some people have literal piles of garbage, while others have more metaphorical piles of garbage. But I really do believe that we can find moments in those pile of garbage times that are jewels. For me, my big pile of garbage time has been from July 2008 right through today and on 'til April. In this time, TSH has been home for about, oh, 4 months total. In that time, the oldest son started preschool, the baby started doing everything, the oldest graduated from preschool, the oldest started kindergarten, and the middle child started preschool. I've worked full-time. I quit my reading endorsement when I just had one class left to take. The air conditioning in my faithful steed went kaput. It has been quite...exhausting. But we've had so much good in our lives. The baby is the sweetest little boy and he's so much easier than the other two were as babies. We were able to buy a house with the help of my brother, so we didn't have to live in an apartment anymore. TSH's bonus finally came through and I bought my beautiful new (to me) Ford Fusion. So many tiny jewels that have let me know how blessed I am. Oh, and, hello! I finished 50,000 words of my novel in 30 days!
So, I said I learned a few things, and I think I learned more than these 3, but I'm going to stick with just these for now. Even if you never write a novel, I hope you find some wisdom in these. And if you do decide to write a novel, you have to do NaNoWriMo. It's the best legal high you can get!
Yep, I've been gone for over a month. I'm sure you're all wondering why. Well, I was participating in National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) and I had to write a 50,000 word novel in 30 days. Although I did write the 50,000 words, I didn't actually finish the novel, so don't start asking when you'll find it in paperback at your local bookstore.
As I worked on my novel, I actually discovered a lot about myself and even a few things about life. And as this the place where I muse, here are my musings about life from NaNoWriMo.
1. When you start to get bored, throw in a love scene. One night I was struggling to get my 1667 words to keep me on track. I was bored. I wasn't enjoying what I was writing. I didn't feel like anything interesting was happening. I was about ready to tear it up (or backspace it all). Instead, however, I decided to throw in a kissing scene. Now, it was a very tasteful kissing scene, don't worry. But it boosted my word count and pushed me over my 1667 words for the evening.
What does this have to do with real life, you ask? You may not have a significant other in your life, or your significant other might be in a land far, far away, so a kissing scene may not be in store for you. But I'm sure you love to do something, right? That's the kind of love scene I'm talking about. Spend some time doing something you really love. If that's crafting, do that. If it's writing, do that. If it's cleaning, um, do that then. Just spend some quality time with that activity. I think it'll boost endorphins almost as much as kissing does.
2. The rule of 400, 900, 1667. I discovered this strange little rule early on in the writing of my 50,000 words. The first 400 words would be fairly easy to write. The next 500 were pure torture! I couldn't think of anything to write. Every time I'd check my word count, it would only be about 20 more than the time I checked it before. Then, somehow, after I'd hit about 900, the next 700+ words were easy sailing.
Here's how I believe this can be applied to real life: It'll get harder before it gets easier. Isn't that something that some aged wisewoman would say? Seriously, I can see it embroidered on a pillow. But it is so true. But maybe, more precisely, I should say, "It'll start out easy and then it'll get harder and then it'll get easier." Sometimes we set out to do something, and it isn't so bad. We think, "Hey, I can totally handle this!" And then we get trucking along, complacent in our ability to accomplish the task and, dagnabit!, it gets hard! We want to give up, because there is just no end in sight to our troubles. And then, miraculously, after a while, things get easier again. Perhaps that is the Circle of Life. Or, as I call it, the rule of 400, 900, 1667.
3. Sometimes you can find jewels in big, huge piles of garbage. Some nights I'd be writing just to get my 1667 words done. I knew what I was writing wasn't very good. I wasn't sure where my plot was going or what motiviated my characters to act. And I'd end up with too many words that were probably (almost certainly) going to be completely cut from my novel. It was word garbage. Big, huge piles of it. But, again, almost certainly, I would discover something new about my characters or I'd write a line of dialogue that I loved or the next part of my plot would suddenly pop into my head. They were teeny, tiny jewels, or sometimes not so teeny, tiny, but they were totally worth going through all of the garbage I had written before.
We all have big, huge piles of garbage in our lives. Some people have literal piles of garbage, while others have more metaphorical piles of garbage. But I really do believe that we can find moments in those pile of garbage times that are jewels. For me, my big pile of garbage time has been from July 2008 right through today and on 'til April. In this time, TSH has been home for about, oh, 4 months total. In that time, the oldest son started preschool, the baby started doing everything, the oldest graduated from preschool, the oldest started kindergarten, and the middle child started preschool. I've worked full-time. I quit my reading endorsement when I just had one class left to take. The air conditioning in my faithful steed went kaput. It has been quite...exhausting. But we've had so much good in our lives. The baby is the sweetest little boy and he's so much easier than the other two were as babies. We were able to buy a house with the help of my brother, so we didn't have to live in an apartment anymore. TSH's bonus finally came through and I bought my beautiful new (to me) Ford Fusion. So many tiny jewels that have let me know how blessed I am. Oh, and, hello! I finished 50,000 words of my novel in 30 days!
So, I said I learned a few things, and I think I learned more than these 3, but I'm going to stick with just these for now. Even if you never write a novel, I hope you find some wisdom in these. And if you do decide to write a novel, you have to do NaNoWriMo. It's the best legal high you can get!
Sunday, October 25, 2009
So, you think you're not creative...
I'm sure you all remember the essay I posted in March about everyone being creative (but if you don't, here's a link).
Well, I've been thinking a lot this past year about having some kind of art retreat, a little like Artfest, but not nearly as large (I was thinking about 10-15 participants), and much closer to home (say, Park City or Heber), but definitely as much fun. And I was thinking about it again tonight, and I said to myself, "Self, why don't we have a creativity retreat instead of an art retreat?" And then I said, "Why, Self, I think that's brilliant! Then we could have lots of different kinds of lessons and workshops and have ridiculous amounts of fun!" And then I clapped my hands together and said, "Okay, Self, let's get started on this."
This retreat would be not just for those who already know they're creative; it would be for those whose creativity is dormant. Yes, even those people who insist that they're not creative would benefit from this retreat. Benefit and have fun.
So, here I am, getting started on a creativity retreat, to be known as the Creative Divas Retreat, and I wanted to put it out to you, my handful of faithful readers, first. Here's what I'm thinking:
Well, I've been thinking a lot this past year about having some kind of art retreat, a little like Artfest, but not nearly as large (I was thinking about 10-15 participants), and much closer to home (say, Park City or Heber), but definitely as much fun. And I was thinking about it again tonight, and I said to myself, "Self, why don't we have a creativity retreat instead of an art retreat?" And then I said, "Why, Self, I think that's brilliant! Then we could have lots of different kinds of lessons and workshops and have ridiculous amounts of fun!" And then I clapped my hands together and said, "Okay, Self, let's get started on this."
This retreat would be not just for those who already know they're creative; it would be for those whose creativity is dormant. Yes, even those people who insist that they're not creative would benefit from this retreat. Benefit and have fun.
So, here I am, getting started on a creativity retreat, to be known as the Creative Divas Retreat, and I wanted to put it out to you, my handful of faithful readers, first. Here's what I'm thinking:
- 3 days and 2 nights in a cabin up in Heber one weekend in July (1, 2, and 3, or 8, 9, and 10)
- All meals and snacks included
- All supplies included
- A special handmade gift from me
- Classes that might include: writing poetry from nature, "Stop thinking and start writing", game piece jewelry, making journals and art journaling, wishing shrines and/or prayer flags, crowns.
And I want to reign in the price at between $200 and $300 (maybe even less). Quite honestly, I want to get it as cheap as I can without scrimping on quality (We will not be eating store brand cookies; only real Oreos will do for my Creative Divas!), so I wouldn't be taking much profit, if any, from the weekend.
This is what I would like from you, dear readers (ooh, I feel Jane Eyre): If you would be interested in such a weekend (no commitment right now, mind you), email me or make a comment on the blog. It would be girls only and a whole lot of silly times, kind of like a pajama party for adults.
Oh, and if you're interested in teaching something that you know how to do/make, let me know that too! I don't know if we could pay anything right now, but it would be a good chance to start getting some teaching experience. And, who knows, maybe the next year it might be even bigger and people will come from all of the world just to take a class from you!
Monday, September 28, 2009
Love
This writing is inspired by J. Ruth Gendler's The Book of Qualities.
Love is very mercurial. Sometimes she is pleasant. She gives you hugs, she tells you how much she cares about you, she makes you feel like you can do no wrong. On those days, she wears red and pink. In fact, she looks like a walking Valentine with hearts embroidered on her cardigan.
But, other days, Love wears steel gray sweaters, jeans, and black combat boots. She's Tough Love and she will kick your butt if you even try to get out of line. She tells you that you're better than you've been behaving and to stop pissing your life away.
Some say Love is bipolar, but she isn't. She just will show you love in any way that will get through to your heart.
Love is very mercurial. Sometimes she is pleasant. She gives you hugs, she tells you how much she cares about you, she makes you feel like you can do no wrong. On those days, she wears red and pink. In fact, she looks like a walking Valentine with hearts embroidered on her cardigan.
But, other days, Love wears steel gray sweaters, jeans, and black combat boots. She's Tough Love and she will kick your butt if you even try to get out of line. She tells you that you're better than you've been behaving and to stop pissing your life away.
Some say Love is bipolar, but she isn't. She just will show you love in any way that will get through to your heart.
Friday, September 4, 2009
A Dear John Letter to A Soda Pop
My dearest Diet Dr. Pepper,
How I have missed you! Every day, I crave your sweet smooth taste. I ache for your lovely brown, bubbling liquid lighting up my dull glass. I dream of the days when I held you in my hands and I knew that I would not be tired because you were there.
But, too quickly, you became a drug. I was addicted to the burst of energy I had when you were my drink of choice. I couldn't sleep at night. And so I had to leave you for your weaker, younger brother, Caffeine Free.
It certainly isn't the same, but he's a safer choice. I can sleep at night now, and I no longer have my recycling bin full of your bottles. It is better. I keep telling myself that. This is the way it needs to be. I'm sorry.
Love,
Andria
P.S. Don't despair. I'm sure you'll be back in my life before you know it. It's only the second week of school.
How I have missed you! Every day, I crave your sweet smooth taste. I ache for your lovely brown, bubbling liquid lighting up my dull glass. I dream of the days when I held you in my hands and I knew that I would not be tired because you were there.
But, too quickly, you became a drug. I was addicted to the burst of energy I had when you were my drink of choice. I couldn't sleep at night. And so I had to leave you for your weaker, younger brother, Caffeine Free.
It certainly isn't the same, but he's a safer choice. I can sleep at night now, and I no longer have my recycling bin full of your bottles. It is better. I keep telling myself that. This is the way it needs to be. I'm sorry.
Love,
Andria
P.S. Don't despair. I'm sure you'll be back in my life before you know it. It's only the second week of school.
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